Guy Issues
Don't you hate pointless discussions?
I went out with a guy today. It was our second "date". I wouldn't even call it a date anymore. It took us a couple of hours to figure out where to go and what to do. My simple suggestions was to have a picnic at a lake or somewhere green. He suggested a park next door. Next to his door that is. Mind you I live in the south and he lives in the north of a huge city. I would never have been so bold as to suggest a place around my corner. So I tried to find something that was equally far from both of us. (...)
We finally went to a park with some little ponds and a river. At last we found the park and a nice spot to spread the blanket. The pointless discussions had already begun at the station. He basically thinks I'm strange, which I know is somewhat true. But he thinks I'm strange for all the wrong reasons.
Is it really normal for someone to try to hug and kiss you after a first date and get all close and physical (holding hands, arms around the shoulder etc.) right from the start? I'm not talking of one harmless gesture, I'm talking of a constant series of attempts. I'm pretty damn sure that this is not normal unless it's love on first sight which for me it wasn't. However, he did all that during our first "date". He's a nice and sweet person (I guess, but then again I'm easily fooled) but I had to tell him to back off several times. Yet he doesn't stop but keeps on doing it, saying this was just him and that with his friends this was completely normal. He also doesn't respect boundaries on a verbal level. He made several remarks that supposedly were meant as a joke, but how am I supposed to know when I don't know him yet.
So he thinks I'm strange for I prefer to get to know a person before eventually letting them too close. And according to his statements I'm the first woman he ever met that acts like this. I wonder what kind of women he has met before. I never had these kind of issues with guys. So in fact he's the first guy I ever met who managed to get too close too fast. Or maybe it was simply mutual before? For I have kissed on a first date before...once...twice when I'm honest, but only once did a second date follow a first.
I like him, but that's it. I can do without him. He would be cool as a friend, but he doesn't want to be just a friend. Why he thinks a relationship would work out, I don't understand. First of all I know it cannot work out for several reasons that I don't want to go into here. And most importantly I am now sure that as a man he's not a bit interesting for me. He's too soft and sweet. As a person I tend to like him because there is more to him than just his need for touch. And if my senses aren't completely fooled he's a person you can rely on when things get down to the bottom. So he's a bit like me, only less organized and with his heart wide open to the world.
Now how do I get my point across that I will not fall in love with him? Without getting into a pointless discussion about how stupid it is not to at least give it a try that is.
I went out with a guy today. It was our second "date". I wouldn't even call it a date anymore. It took us a couple of hours to figure out where to go and what to do. My simple suggestions was to have a picnic at a lake or somewhere green. He suggested a park next door. Next to his door that is. Mind you I live in the south and he lives in the north of a huge city. I would never have been so bold as to suggest a place around my corner. So I tried to find something that was equally far from both of us. (...)
We finally went to a park with some little ponds and a river. At last we found the park and a nice spot to spread the blanket. The pointless discussions had already begun at the station. He basically thinks I'm strange, which I know is somewhat true. But he thinks I'm strange for all the wrong reasons.
Is it really normal for someone to try to hug and kiss you after a first date and get all close and physical (holding hands, arms around the shoulder etc.) right from the start? I'm not talking of one harmless gesture, I'm talking of a constant series of attempts. I'm pretty damn sure that this is not normal unless it's love on first sight which for me it wasn't. However, he did all that during our first "date". He's a nice and sweet person (I guess, but then again I'm easily fooled) but I had to tell him to back off several times. Yet he doesn't stop but keeps on doing it, saying this was just him and that with his friends this was completely normal. He also doesn't respect boundaries on a verbal level. He made several remarks that supposedly were meant as a joke, but how am I supposed to know when I don't know him yet.
So he thinks I'm strange for I prefer to get to know a person before eventually letting them too close. And according to his statements I'm the first woman he ever met that acts like this. I wonder what kind of women he has met before. I never had these kind of issues with guys. So in fact he's the first guy I ever met who managed to get too close too fast. Or maybe it was simply mutual before? For I have kissed on a first date before...once...twice when I'm honest, but only once did a second date follow a first.
I like him, but that's it. I can do without him. He would be cool as a friend, but he doesn't want to be just a friend. Why he thinks a relationship would work out, I don't understand. First of all I know it cannot work out for several reasons that I don't want to go into here. And most importantly I am now sure that as a man he's not a bit interesting for me. He's too soft and sweet. As a person I tend to like him because there is more to him than just his need for touch. And if my senses aren't completely fooled he's a person you can rely on when things get down to the bottom. So he's a bit like me, only less organized and with his heart wide open to the world.
Now how do I get my point across that I will not fall in love with him? Without getting into a pointless discussion about how stupid it is not to at least give it a try that is.
posted by -t- @ 22:41
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